The protagonist is the one from whose perspective we get the story. Just came back from Maleficent. Eye candy and a layered retelling of Sleeping Beauty. Someone I knew murdered his wife. He strangled her. It was one of those, “He seemed like such a nice guy” kind of stories. T said it takes a lot of anger to do that. I said, “He is terribly broken to have done …
Beatrice, a capuchin, says, “You are insignificant.” Beatrice says, “No one cares about you.” Beatrice says, “They expect nothing from you, why bother at all.” Beatrice is pissing me off. Adder, the lemur, thinks this is just fine. She rejoices in rage. She whispers, “Anger is powerful. Fuck that simpering bitch. Stoke that fire. Let’s get it on.” I’d rather that they both shut up and let me sleep instead …
How do I work this? Struggling with the storyboard and the broad strokes of the piece I am working on. Got the ending (I think) and the introductory shot but am uncertain about what I want to say and how I want to make you feel. I have no doubt of my ability to make pretty pictures, but there should be a there there. No hook as yet. No takeaway. …
Manually transferring years of blog posts in an effort to find my monkeys. I did write daily for four years starting June 03, 2003. Or was it 2004? The timestamp on the entries say one year and the comments say another. I am made aware that the writing is inconsistent. Some of the posts are just stupid. Some are surprisingly good. That’s the whole point of writing every day, isn’t …
Sorry I was a disappointment. I loved my dad, but I don’t think we were ever really at ease with one another. Maybe it was just me. I never got the feeling he really approved of where I lived or how things ended with me and Jim. I look at my own kids and it’s easier to be connected with one over another. We are still personalities after all, and …
It was a mistake to go o the attic. I had mistaken the quiet for…what? resolution? That maybe they were gone? Freddie is chittering, “titties! boobs!” Stupid little thing. We’re okay. He wings overhead as I hit the top of the stairs. I track him as he goes round three times and closes the door to the birdcage where he sleeps. Guess he just wanted me to know he was …
Today, I am me. That would be the first image with the green wall. Today’s words: me, relieved, alive. Yesterday and the days preceding I would have said “This is the year that I became my age.” This wasn’t a thing until recently, but mortality and all that is knocking hard.
Words: tired, okay, myself
Words: content, centered, breathing This would be the self I recognize – generally chill, imperturbable, at ease. Whew. I now understand temporary insanity and will try to be better at empathizing. In the meantime, happy to be. It means that this person is still there and she’ll be back.
